| Thursday, February 26, 2004 - 11:23 pm |
Just a clarification--11 months and 1 day after war was declared. Only 7 months and 1 day after war started.
(ECNN Errata Department)
| Friday, February 27, 2004 - 04:53 am |
Imperial Center, Wartime Concubine
September 21, 2186
Ancorman Semore Butts reporting,
President Medicated announced victory today in the armies southern push into the lowlands of the Bandria Granda region of Eridana. 45,000 tanks spearheaded the drive into the Tango Alliance and Milenia Century of The Real Majapahit, only 900 tanks survived the attack.
After the Southern Offencive was done, Field General Chat ordered the army to relocate to Wartime 3of1 for a northern offencive into the mountains of The Republic of Moon dion. 58,000 tanks and 290,000 soldiers will arrive within the next 4 months to begin the campain.
President Medicated claims to have launched these campains in an effort to expand Wartime control and influence throughout the Bandria Granda region. The President's top critic, Congresswomen Herpy, announced just resently that links between President Medicated and the Enterprise "Strategic Stockpile" have begun to emerge. A congresstional hearing is investigating these accusations.
Strategic Stockpile denies any connection with Wartime's war efforts. "We sell all our weapons on the open market" says SS's deputy CEO Lighty Medicated, brother of President Heavily Medicated.
This is Semore Butts reporting for WARN 10.
WARN 10 ©
WARTIME NEWS NETWORK CHANNEL 10
| Friday, February 27, 2004 - 05:23 am |
September 25, 2186
President Boy has issued an edict today. All citizens in the lands controlled by Empirical Chess must learn some recognized version of chess within 1 year or by the time they are 10 years old. Any citizen that learns checkers in lieu of chess will be executed. A list of recognized versions of chess follows:
1. Standard Chess
2. Siamese Chess (a four player variation)
3. Kriegspiel (doubly blind chess)
4. Xiangqi (Chinese Chess)
5. Shogi (Japanese chess)
6. Any timed variation of the above
This is an effort to increase the education of the citizens, especially of the recently conquered territories.
Brighton Everyman, Education correspondant, ECNN
| Tuesday, March 02, 2004 - 01:57 am |
Sunday, May 12, 2187 (whatever that means--it may as well be May 12, 31)
Utter confusion has hit the world. Citizens from countries all over FB can't remember anything beyond about 30 years ago. That this is a sudden occurrence is testified by the fact that citizens from countries that have been maintained by the government known as C3 for longer than 30 years remember remembering things from beyond that time, but they don't remember what they were remembering. Somewhat less affected by this mass amnesia are presidents and corporate executive officers.
These memory losses also appear to be different from previously reported amnesias. The previous amnesias, sometimes called "resets," hit entire empires with mass insanities, causing extremely high levels of murder, which was then followed by amnesia. The resets have, as far as we can tell at the moment, hit empires at random. Some empires have been hit twice in the past 30 years, with a period of about 15 years. President Boy has confirmed the period, stating that the current rumors have the period increased to 20 years, but not the randomness. It is his claim that reset amnesia hits empires based on when the government switched from the control of C3.
The insanities in reset amnesia had several other side effects. Permanent brain damage was done to many highly skilled workers, causing corporations that depended on them to suffer and close. The murdrous rages of the citizens abated when empire populations were close to 8,000,000 people per country, but before that happened, the number and types of weapons in each country hit a common (as if controlled in some way) level. Unfortunately, the insanity of the citizens does not appear to end until all territories annexed to an empire have reverted to the government of C3.
Less is known about the recent amnesia, except that it is global in scale, and does not appear to be associated with any kind of mass insanity. Conspiracy theorists in the lands of Empirical Chess have conjured up ideas that an alien race responsible for reset amnesia has been working on building a mind control device. The insanity of the resets is a side effect of an early version, and the latest version is responsible for the sudden amnesia we are currently experiencing
Anne Mesia, Chaos correspondant
| Tuesday, March 02, 2004 - 12:34 pm |
NO DAMN YOU!!!
| Thursday, March 04, 2004 - 12:24 am |
September 9, 2187-
Ministry of War, Ciudad de Berlioz Nueva-
New Berliozian troops have been ordered to mobilize for war against the neighboring country of Gray Legion to the north. The people show great apporval of this war as a first step in regaining the former glory that was the old Berliozian Empire....(without the arrogance, debt, greed and corrpution)
| Friday, March 05, 2004 - 03:24 am |
Thursday, November 18, 2187
Victory for the Chessman forces of Spassky was announced one week ago against the country formerly known as Northumberland. The war was approved by the people on May 12, 2187. Continuous attacks from Sept. 25-29 greatly weakened the resolve of the Northumberland forces. Nimz allowed his troops a few weeks of R&R before starting attacks up again on Nov. 10. The following day, C3 gave up control of Northumberland. The empire is now pleased to present to the world its newest annexation, Capablanca!
War correspondant, ECNN
In other news, President Boy has recieved intelligence indicating mass insanity will befall our great empire in just over 1 year.
Chaos correspondant, ECNN
| Friday, March 05, 2004 - 07:13 am |
Tuesday, November 30, 2187
Citizens of our chess based empire are starting to get concerned that President Boy may not be immune to the reset insanity. He is starting to show signs of irrational behavior--he has declared war on the three remaining neighbors to the country Spassky, when he is aware that they will turn back to the government of C3 within a year. Concerns are mounting, but, oddly enough, so is the approval rating. People are at 93.7% of international standard rating for satisfaction with their lives.
War correspondant, ECNN
in conjunction with
Spassky Bureaus of War and Statistics
| Tuesday, March 09, 2004 - 02:59 am |
Update from the Errata Dept:
Insanity projections indicate 1.5 years of sanity left.